Nathan, Nathan, Nathan,

I'm sorry this is coming as an email.  I know you said that these are hard to download, but if I don't write this down now, I'll forget all the juicy details.  Now don't tell Simon and Grant this.  I know that it will eventually end up in your project or whatever, but don't tell them this soon.  They laugh at the fact that I still go into chatrooms and this would crack them up.  Anyway, I was in the ChicagoM4M chatroom the other day.  Now I don't really go in there to hook up with anybody, but it's fun to talk.  You know how that is.  Anyway, I was in there and this guy starts talking to me.  I checked his profile and was surprised because some of the details in there reminded me so much of this guy in my rotation.  I know the guy reasonably well.  We've worked together on the occasional project and I've had a chance to learn a couple of things about him.  I suspected he swings on both sides of the fence, so to speak, but he's never given me any clear sense that he was "family" (I know you hate when I use that term, but bear with me . . . Mr. Sociologist).  Anyway, he's talking to me and telling me stuff about his tastes in men and how he thinks I sound cute.  Of course, I'm freaking out because it's getting more and more obvious that this is him.  I mean, how many 5'11, Cuban, ex Air Force ROTC, medical students who are originally from Raleigh can there be in Chicago?  Now, while I don't mind close friends knowing that I'm bi, I'm not quite out in my department (especially since I don't want to close off any more doors to some of these women . . .they think I'm "adorable". . . ugh!).  Anyway, this guy is telling me about all of this sex he's getting and I'm imagining things and . . . . did I tell you this guy is a hottie? . . . then he asks me to send a picture of myself.  I had to do some serious thinking.  If I send him a real picture of me, that would be the end of our conversation and I was actually enjoying it.  He'd know who I was and that would be a problem.  Anonymity out the window.  If I don't send him a picture, he'd also end the conversation.  I should have just told him I didn't have one (now that I think about it.  DAMN!).  So, I sent him a picture of Charley (remember him?  Sigh!).  I had second thoughts about sending the picture and told him not to send me his picture.  He did anyway and I couldn't help but look.  As the thing downloaded, I was losing it.  It was him.  Now what?  He wanted to talk some more . . . he thought Charley was cute (who wouldn't!?).  I agreed to talk some more and then hung up.  I felt really bad about the whole deception thing and sent him a note apologizing and suggesting that we won't be talking anymore.  That way, I don't have to keep up a facade.  I'd be zapped from his online world, so to speak.  He sent back an angry response and it was pretty much over, I guess.  But I'm still going crazy, Nathan.  What do I do when I see him again?  I know classes are over, but he's going to stay around over the summer and I'm sure I'll see him at things classmates are throwing together.  Is my life dramatic or what?  Forget medical school.  I should join you and write.

Other than that, nothing else is new.  I'm done for the semester and that's a wonderful thing.  I'm not sure what I'm going to do with myself this summer.  Maybe you can send me your friend Caitlin's phone number.  Doesn't she do some work with volunteers or something?  I would love to do some volunteer things this summer.  The more brain dead the better.  Do you think they have volunteer watchers at those construction projects downtown?  I could just stand around and make sure the guys are working hard.  Uh, oh . . trigger word.  I should go.

Ryan.